After 26 years in business, I’ve heard every excuse, myth, and magic-bullet theory fundraising has to offer.
Here’s the list.
Brace yourself for these fundraising delusions—or better yet, don’t. It won’t help.
Delusion No. 1
“Planned Giving? We’re not ready for that.”
You’re ready for bake sales and spaghetti dinners, but not free money that takes a signature and a lawyer? Okay.
Delusion No. 2
“We just need a good gala.”
Ah yes—the magical evening where warm wine and wilted salad somehow fix structural revenue problems.
Delusion No. 3
“We don’t talk politics here.”
Your donor does. Over Glenfiddich 21* with a large cube. With their financial advisor. While you’re busy not Googling them.
Delusion No. 4
“Our board is very involved.”
They show up. They nod. They leave. That’s not involvement—that’s attendance.
Delusion No. 5
“We can’t afford a planned giving program.”
You can’t afford not to. But sure—print more tote bags.
Delusion No. 6
“We need younger donors.”
Yes, because 32-year-olds drowning in student debt are prime prospects for seven-figure bequests.
Delusion No. 7
“Social media will save us.”
You cannot deposit likes. Especially not the ones from your intern’s college roommate.
Delusion No. 8
“We don’t like to talk about money.”
Why are you fundraising?
Delusion No. 9
“We’re waiting for the right moment.”
And your donors are writing checks to people who didn’t wait.
Delusion No. 10
“It’s all about relationships.”
True. But if your “relationship” hasn’t led to a gift in five years, it’s a coffee habit, not a fundraising strategy.
Delusion No. 11
“We need more awareness.”
No—you need more gifts. Awareness doesn’t pay salaries.
These Are Priceless
Delusion No. 12
“Our brand will attract donors.”
Unless your brand is named Gates, Walton, or Buffett … probably not.
Delusion No. 13
“Let’s make a quick video.”
No. Create a well-crafted video; not one designed to get “likes” from peers on social media.
Delusion No. 14
“We’ll wait until the economy improves.”
Donors give in downturns. They just give to people who ask.
Delusion No. 15
“We’re different.”
No, you’re not. And if you were, you wouldn’t need to say it.
Delusion No. 16
“The donor already knows our needs.”
And yet somehow, still hasn’t written the check. Weird.
Delusion No. 17
“The thank-you letter is enough stewardship.”
Only if your goal is “never again.”
Delusion No. 18
“We’re too small for planned giving.”
Planned gifts don’t care about your staff size. They care about your mission and your ask.
Delusion No. 19
“We sent a newsletter.”
Congratulations. So did Bed Bath & Beyond.
Delusion No. 20
“Major gifts will come when the time is right.”
Time doesn’t give gifts. People do.
Delusion No. 21
“We can’t afford to offend anyone.”
Then enjoy the mediocrity of trying to please everyone. And congrats for joining the “safest” group in the world.
Delusion No. 22
“We just need more volunteers.”
Great. Who’s going to train, manage, and feed them?
Delusion No. 23
“Our donors are different.”
They still have egos, portfolios, and emotional triggers. Just like everyone else.
Delusion No. 24
“The wealthy will find us.”
This is fundraising, not hide-and-seek.
Delusion No. 25
“Let’s just put it on the website.”
Because nothing says urgency like being buried three clicks deep.
Some of These Are Painful
Delusion No. 26
“We’re grassroots.”
Translation: We’re broke and proud of it.
Delusion No. 27
“We don’t want to sound like we’re begging.”
You’re not. You’re inviting someone to fund impact. Unless you’re actually begging. Then… stop.
Delusion No. 28
“We’re mission-driven, not money-driven.”
Try saying that to payroll or let’s see how far that gets you on rent day
Delusion No. 29
“Our cause sells itself.”
Nothing sells itself. Not even Girl Scout cookies.
Delusion No. 30
“We don’t need consultants.”
You also don’t need experience, strategy, or results. Apparently.
Delusion No. 31
“We’re a best-kept secret.”
That’s not a compliment. That’s a failure of outreach and marketing.
Delusion No. 32
“We’re too busy to fundraise.”
If you’re too busy to bring in money, you won’t be busy for long.
Delusion No. 33
“Our cause speaks for itself.”
That’s adorable. Does it also write grants and close major gifts?
Delusion No. 34
“We can’t talk to wealthy people. That’s uncomfortable.”
So is bankruptcy.
Delusion No. 35
“We’re like a family.”
That’s exactly how many dysfunctional orgs describe themselves.
Delusion No. 36
“Donors just want to help.”
No—they want meaning, recognition, control, and sometimes a wing with their name on it.
Delusion No. 37
“We’ll get to that next quarter.”
Next quarter becomes next year becomes never.
Delusion No. 38
“We already thanked them.”
Once? That’s cute.
Delusion No. 39
“We just need a better CRM.”
CRMs don’t fix bad habits. Or bad fundraisers.
Delusion No. 40
“We don’t want to be too aggressive.”
Then don’t be. Be clear, confident, and competent. Which is worse?
Delusion No. 41
“We’re waiting on a big grant.”
Hope is not a fundraising strategy.
Delusion No. 42
“Our executive director doesn’t like asking.”
Then maybe they should direct something else.
Delusion No. 43
“We don’t need to track metrics.”
Great. Let’s just guess our way to insolvency.
Delusion No. 44
“Email blasts are enough.”
Yes, if your goal is to be ignored in bulk.
Delusion No. 45
“We’re not salespeople.”
You are if you want donations. This is sales with a halo.
Delusion No. 46
“We can’t ask again so soon.”
Donors don’t remember your calendar. They remember your impact.
Delusion No. 47
“It’s not the right time.”
It never is. And it always is.
Delusion No. 48
“But we sent a brochure.”
So did the dentist’s office.
Delusion No. 49
“Our programs speak for themselves.”
Programs don’t speak. People do.
Delusion No. 50
“We’re just not good at marketing.”
And you’re fine with that?
Delusion No. 51
“We don’t want to look desperate.”
Then stop being desperate. Start being strategic.
Delusion No. 52
“We’ll get to planned giving when we grow.”
Planned giving is how you grow.
Delusion No. 53
“Our donors are too old for email.”
Funny. They’re not too old for million-dollar IRAs.
Delusion No. 54
“We need a better tagline.”
No, you need a better call to action.
Delusion No. 55
“We’re mission-first.”
Congratulations. So is every nonprofit. And?
Delusion No. 56
“Our story will move people.”
Only if you tell it. Clearly. And ask for something.
If You've Read This Far….
Congratulations. You’re either the problem, the solution, or deeply entertained. Either way, you’re hooked.
So stop pretending this doesn’t apply to you. It does. So let’s continue …
Delusion No. 57
“We don’t want to bother them.”
You’re not bothering them. You’re giving them purpose. Unless you’re doing it badly.
Delusion No. 58
“We’ll get a celebrity involved.”
Yes, because nothing says reliability like waiting on someone’s agent to call back.
Delusion No. 59
“We’re not in it for the money.”
Then stop asking for it?
Delusion No. 60
“We’ll do a matching campaign!”
If your campaign is weak, a match won’t fix it. It just makes your failure symmetrical.
Delusion No. 61
“We’re too busy changing lives to fundraise.”
Spoiler: You won’t be changing anything when the money runs out.
Delusion No. 62
“We want to grow organically.”
Translation: We’re afraid of asking and allergic to strategy.
Delusion No. 63
“We’re not like other nonprofits.”
You’re exactly like other nonprofits—unless you can prove otherwise.
Delusion No. 64
“We can’t track that.”
Translation: We don’t want accountability.
Delusion No. 65
“If they cared, they’d give.”
They care about a hundred things. You’re one. Act like it.
Delusion No. 66
“We need a viral moment.”
You need consistent donors. Not TikTok.
Delusion No. 67
“The donors will come to us.”
Yes. Right after they finish donating to people who asked first.
Delusion No. 68
“We’re in a small town.”
So was Sam Walton. What’s your point?
Delusion No. 69
“We’re afraid to lose donors.”
Keep coddling. See how many stay.
Delusion No. 70
“We’ve always done it this way.”
Famously, the last words of organizations before extinction.
Delusion No. 71
“Let’s hire someone young to do social.”
Great. Maybe they can Snapchat your budget deficit.
Delusion No. 72
“We want diverse donors but don’t know where to start.”
Try starting somewhere.
Delusion No. 73
“We don’t want to pressure anyone.”
Pressure? Or clarity? One raises money. The other gets you polite nods.
Delusion No. 74
“We’re values-driven.”
Who isn’t? It’s not a differentiator. It’s the minimum requirement.
Delusion No. 75
“The donor didn’t respond.”
Did you follow up? Twice? Thought so.
Delusion No. 76
“We just launched a podcast.”
Ah, the sound of your donor listening … to something else.
Delusion No. 77
“We need a better theme for our gala.”
Try: “Stop having them.”
Delusion No. 78
“Our staff wears many hats.”
Including the one labeled panic.
Delusion No. 79
“The donor already knows us.”
People forget what you said. They remember how you made them feel ignored.
Delusion No. 80
“We’re not fundraising—just educating.”
And starving.
Delusion No. 81
“We didn’t have time to prepare.”
You had time. You just had other priorities. Own it.
The Top 20 I hear Every Week!
Delusion No. 82
“Our mission is enough.”
Not without a plan.
Delusion No. 83
“We’re building community.”
Great. Is it sustainable or just sentimental?
Delusion No. 84
“We’ll launch a capital campaign.”
Because the small ones are going so well?
Delusion No. 85
“We’re not comfortable asking for money.”
Then you’re in the wrong profession.
Delusion No. 86
“We got great feedback.”
That’s not revenue.
Delusion No. 87
“We sent a survey.”
So did Starbucks. And they don’t need your donation.
Delusion No. 88
“We’re building trust.”
Trust without follow-up is just silence with good intentions.
Delusion No. 89
“The staff is burned out.”
Then stop asking them to do more with less—and start fundraising like you mean it.
Delusion No. 90
“We need more data.”
You need more guts.
Delusion No. 91
“We don’t want to chase money.”
Then stop chasing donors and start building partnerships.
Delusion No. 92
“We’re nonprofit. We can’t think like a business.”
You may not want to think like a business, but you need to run your nonprofit like one.
Delusion No. 93
“Let’s try crowdfunding.”
Because asking strangers for pennies will surely stabilize the budget.
Delusion No. 94
“We’re afraid to offend.”
Courage is part of leadership. You can’t fundraise from fear.
Delusion No. 95
“We’re too new for that.”
So? Start now or start late. Your call.
Delusion No. 96
“We hired a development director. They’ll fix it.”
The Titanic hired a captain, too.
Delusion No. 97
“We’re not fundraisers—we’re changemakers.”
And who pays for the change?
Delusion No. 98
“We have great intentions.”
So does everyone else.
Delusion No. 99
“We’re doing our best.”
And? Results don’t care.
Delusion No. 100
“We subscribe to a free will service. We’ve got it all covered.”
Ah. You also subscribe to WebMD—so you’re all set for brain surgery.
At this point, you might need it.
Delusion No. 101
“But they’ve been around forever.”
So has mold. And at least mold doesn’t send newsletters.
That’s 100. Plus 1.
There are more, of course. But these should keep most organizations busy for a while.
If you recognized yourself in a few—good. That means you’re paying attention. Now do something about it.
If you didn’t recognize yourself at all—read it again. Slowly. These aren’t just snarky one-liners. They’re patterns. Habits. Excuses.
And they quietly kill results.
The difference between thriving and barely surviving? It’s not your gala. It’s not your tagline. It’s not your CRM.
It’s your willingness to face the truth—and act on it.
Ready to stop guessing? Join the Planned Giving and Major Gifts Boot Camps. Built on real-world experience. No fluff. Just what works.
Trusted by over 5,000 nonprofits across 26 years.
Staying stuck is a choice. So is moving forward.
Think I missed one?
I probably did—there’s a fresh delusion born every minute.
Send yours in. We’ll keep the list growing … just like the excuses.
There’s always room for Delusion No. 103.
Credit optional. Shame guaranteed.
*Glenfiddich 21 Year Old Gran Reserva is a single malt Scotch whisky. $259.00. No, I’m not ready to splurge yet.
